I’ve had a few un-journaled meditations in the last week, including the evening session, but I haven’t been able to do every morning. A mixture of being out of the habit and childcare commitments has conspired against me. I was looking forward to sitting this morning.
I set the essential oils out with my eldest and sat on the cushion. I heard her in the background for a while pottering around my office but she soon got bored and returned to the other room. I didn’t find this a distraction in any case. As I sat I took a longer body scan than normal. Focusing on a body part of a pair of parts for a short period before moving. Eventually getting to the breath I felt very calm. I had a couple of issues with posture, particularly my legs and hands. I mindfully shuffled a few times during the sitting eventually finding a good spot.
The breathing itself was pretty good, as was the focus. I’ve been trying to let go of controlling the breathing, and just observing the in and out. I find this quite difficult when you are watching so closely but I was able to do this better than I had expected. I was also very content for the most part, with impatience coming in short manageable bursts, which I noted while not giving to much interest to it.
I was noting “in” and “out” for the first ten minutes or so, at the very start I also used a count after the out breath. Eventually, I dropped all internal commentary and although a little thinking crept into this without the commentary, I found it more peaceful. Overall a pleasant session. I will try to go back to doing all the morning sessions this week.